to fly.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

After thought :

I'll miss mong. my only econs partner. the only one walking me to the bus stop after econs lec too. sigh. MONG MONGGG!!!!!!!!!!!! (felt so guilty suddenly *could picture ur sigh right now*)
I'll miss chicken rice.
I'll miss some teachers.
I'll miss daidee n bridge sessions. Wonder if anyone still plays that in poly. HMMMMM. NAHS.
I'll miss the zak's smiles. Don't know why though.
I'll miss Philip Tan. REALLY!
I'll miss "first love" cafe's hotdogs (man..... 1s02 . greedy peeps. LOLS )
I'll miss that PEEEGG's silly jokes.
I'll miss writing on PEEEG's arms. N with a BIG CIRLCE ard it. MY TRADEMARK. REMEMBER ME NERN POK! (one person less to sign on ur cast(if u have one) or bandage =] )
I'll miss Danny's jiao wei.
I'll miss the bickering.
I'll miss the change to see how famous amos cookie looks like after changing the colour of his braces. i'm never hungry with cookie around. yummy...
I'll miss playing with PEBBLES!
I'll miss playing "zhong ji mi ma"
I'll miss having the opportunity to shoot. (so, Rong jun u better get in the school team and do me proud!!!!!!!!)
I'll miss the big clique.

2:08:00 AM let 'em go.

Sunday, April 24, 2005

APPEAL was sucCesSfuLLLLLL~~~~~~~~~

ngee ann polytechnic - business studies.

yea! laptop! yea.. iBook! HERe I COME! lols.

*an invisible hand pulls me back to reality*

Np's doesn't support Mac, only windows. If i choose to get an iBook , it will mean that I couldn't surf the net. darn.

compaq , ibm n fujitsu?

i'll just let dad decide.

well... we'll see.

So many things to see to these days... paperwork, etc.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

11:27:00 PM let 'em go.

Friday, April 22, 2005

new skin.

i know its SMALL. but... i'll just keep it this way until i find the giraffe's file.

hey guys. My starhub line had been terminated recently.

However, i can still receive incoming smses and calls.

sigh.

still down with cough and sore throat.

quite minor but never seems to get better.

no signs of recovery. GET WELL SOON JY!

Unfinished tutorials still on my desk, untouched .... great. AGAIN

I've been told that my econs teacher's a no-push over = a mean-ie.
She asks questions before tutorial starts, anyone who stumbles upon e qn or get any of e concepts wrong, well ... back to primary school - Copy lecture notes, MIN 5 times. But such tactics seemed to work . there's this guy in my clz, Mrs lim punished him for getting concepts wrong, and so he copied e whole lec notes fer TEN TIMES. Now he could recite almost EVERYTHING in the notes.

purpose attained. Isn't that wonderful?

Her facial expression and emotions, could change within a blink of an eye. I've been through it and hated the tension.

Come to think about it.....
She reminds me of the English teacher I used to have in sec 4. Forgotten what's her name, but I could still recall that she's a relief teacher... rather plump, long straight hair and a Russian + ??? mix. YEA her. eWWW.

okay. now, big plans.

Jy's strategies against Econs Teacher :

REMAIN low-profile.

make sure she doesn't know what's my name.

Hence, she won't know that I exist .

7:08:00 PM let 'em go.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

i think its time i call out to all my goooodie n bestie friends.
I need a "battery recharge" -> meaning. gatherings. people, nice company just makes me happy.

coffee session - undone.
calls fr the familiar ones -nil-
life's pretty messed up. and tight. packed like SARDINES.
Feeling so miserable coz i can't eat CHICKEN RICE in sch coz i'm so sick.
Schoolwork is piling up every day.
SNOWball effect seems to be forming.
I'm still sitting on the fence. Ppl r psycho-ing me into JC once again. I'M SO INTO POLY! ARGH! **CRIES**
I love the company i have in srjc. **SMILES**

Shooting session today seems to be turning on the bright side. That guy I used to dislike, despise & loathe seems to be more friendly now. Fog's clearing.
I've learnt something thru the whole experience i had in shooting, don't label someone just based on the first impression, yes, FIRST impression still counts. but well... things might tend to turn better/nasty after U know him/her well enough. ONE WORD - " preserverance "

that's all fer today.
fatigue.

9:47:00 PM let 'em go.

Pope Benedict XVI

conservative pope

"We were all hoping for a different pope - a Latin American perhaps - but not an ultraconservative like this," she said.

taken from NBC news.

conservative pope? pardon me for my ignorance. but can someone explain n eleborate on that?

Some are moderate, etc. what's the difference?

9:06:00 PM let 'em go.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Bad Karma

I wonder sometimes if you could count on your fingers and toes how many times I've let you down

It never took much to make you smile but instead all I ever did was make you cry

And in the end I've lost you

And I don't expect you to believe me when I say it will be alright… it will be fine

To you it must be nothing more than bitter lies

You've awoken to a nightmare with no hope of being saved

And though you've given it all it's not enough

And I was trying to be sincere

And I can only tell you the way I feel now

Because everything seemed all so new to me

And even though I saw the signs it was still not clear

The things I've done to hurt you have cursed me along the way.

GONE.

9:52:00 AM let 'em go.

Monday, April 18, 2005

It's pouring outside now.
I'm glad that i've made the correct decision to come back home straight after three lectures I had today.
I felt really sick yesterday already, but i didn't bother much and still went fer prata with dad. Cycling under the hot sun with bros, sat down in front of the TV munching cheezels.
What i got this morning, dry throat, nose-block, running a rather high temperature and couldn't even speak properly.

I just slept on till 10am.

Had a hard time getting out of bed, all my energy seemed to be drained away......

Decided to call the AMK polyclinic appointment hotline . (i saw this ad the other time when i went to there coz PON sch gotta get MC. ) alright. here goes.

"can i make an appointment?"

"appointments are only for paitents with chronic diseases"

"oh thanks."

"But if u're visiting the polyclinic on mondays, go before 12pm to avoid the peak hours. Or after 2pm."

"thanks"

i'm so dissapointed . that means i hafta wait for two hours!!!!!!!!
I really needed the doc asap, head spinning...

When i reached the polyclinic, pulled the heavy green-tinted- glass door, the place was all filled with people. Almost every seat was filled up.

MIND : i m shutting down soon.
Body : Energy level running LOW. NEEED carbs!

That's it. i need a family doctor... everything's settled within fifteen minutes. Oh goodie.

Checked the time when i left the clinic, 12pm.

Fifteen minutes before Econs lecture starts.

Yea. I'm on the dot.

Lunch : Food + medicine(eww... the tablets r really difficult to swallow)

After a few lectures, I couldn't take it anymore.

So here i m... typing away........

Sorry ben, i couldn't make it today for coffee...

[Caffine doesn't go wif medicine] - The doc overheard our conversation and told me this. hahhas..

we'll meet up again soon k~

4:33:00 PM let 'em go.

Friday, April 15, 2005

benji : don't know if u even have time to read this , anyway -------------------------------
monday remember. gonna die of #@$@#!%$^ all the @$!@^$#@%#$~@!%$#@ for such a long time. Decaying from inside. no calls fer e whole week, i wonder how i survived that.

Everyone will be so busy with what they're doing .

It's just a matter of time when u peeps will go separate ways.

Life's like that.

Whining . Complaining . Was one of my forte. how silly.

And it still is.

Things happen so quickly that I don't even have time to react.

Childhood, will still be and always be, the best.

Friends are so far away these days.

So many things on hand, I don't even know where to start.

I'm lost. I think i need a compass to direct me in life.

I need time.

I need encouragement and reassurance.

I need money.

I heard smth fr the back of my head suddenly. " K. GET A LIFE. "

i'll drop this senseless talk. getting nowhere.

*************

I'll pray hard that I could get into NP. At the same time, hope that the people I meet there will be "nice".

11:35:00 PM let 'em go.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Team excellence Camp was a hell lot of fun.
Basically I enjoyed it. Just that the weather's too hot.

Nern n rj called me "chao-enthu-ists"

-_________- ''

D.I.S.C's personality profiling workshop definitely helped me know more bout myself somehow or another.
Like where's my strengths n weakness lies(which may not b accurate)
I don't even know if the survey I did was truthful. nvm. I'll soon forget bout what I did today anyway. I tend to have a short-term memory, coz I sort of tried recalling what interesting stuff the lecturer said earlier today but just couldn't make out one. UM... Probably there's too much of it. information loaded.

Initiating shutdown sequence.
*END*

HICHEWS!!!

8:15:00 PM let 'em go.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Benji : Remember a few days back, we talked bout a guy named benjamin in my CG? oh yea... i've got the wrong person. hahahas... he's from ACS(I)
-__________________- AHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.............
YEAP.

Janel: dearrie!! i miss u!!

well. lets start. Cheryl's birthday. We had our birthday FEAST at Nydc @ suntec.
She got a nice balloon from nydc's team. how nice ?
All of us except Siqi brought along cameras for such a "SYMBOLIC EVENT"
However, i think we only had like 3-5 pictures taken using Cheryl's camera?

First of all.
Mine -> Cameras run on batteries? and..... i didn't have them in my camera when i brought them out. (one down)
Jojo -> Resolution not good. lightings are too dim. (two d0wn)
Cheryl -> Hers was functioning well, initially. her camera failed on her while we're taking the most 'breathtaking' shot. sigh.... she forgotten to check whether the battery's full or not. oh well.....

So.. we just make do with what we have.
Phone cameras.
we got the waiters(*ahem* lookalike. we laughed our heads off that) to take pictures for us.
We asked for candles on our cheesecakes, we waited for quite awhile for that lil candle.

Ohoh... and u know what? There were two other groups of ppl celebrating birthdays too. that's so......... coincidental isn't it? Three bday girls in the same restaurant, at that particular hour.

Seventeen years back @ Tan Tock Seng or any other hospitals in Singapore, doctors and nurses must had been really busy.

Tue + Wed = Team Excellence Camp
Aim: BONDing of CGs.

AND the Best part is that... it ends at 1pm. =] **smiles**
I'll have fun. ciaos peeps~

12:13:00 AM let 'em go.

Sunday, April 10, 2005

Date: 9th April
Time: 10.15 pm
Venue: Chomp Chomp

Dad: "eh.. tmr wake up at 6am"
Me: "having breakfast so early? I bet u can't wake up . "
Dad: "No, lim chu kang. Qingming ?"
Me: *eyes wide open* "oh....okie. there got "kong ba pao" right? k. i'll be going"

Date: 10th April
Time: SUNDAY MORNING. 6.15am
Venue: The first room after the flight of stairs, MY ROOM

Everyone's awake, which I have no idea why. I thought only dad and I will be going out THAT early. Mummy's getting worked up coz i just couldn't get off the bed. Jon's getting ready, sipping hot milo downstairs in his usual hideous green-peihwa's uniform. Benjamin - surprisingly still sleeping soundly despite the chaotic situation.

Clambering out of the bed, to the toilet... blah blah blah...

**FIVE MINS LATER**

We left the house, mum's still nagging .

We made our way to No.7's hse (we address uncles not by name, but number rankings) which used to be our first meeting point where everyone would first gather before heading off lim chu kang together.

Time :6.20 am - on the van-

Me : "hey.. u guys reached already?" (we're pretty late already, yes, 6.20's considered LATE)
Other: "huh?! today we not going.. No.7 not free.. "
Me : "HUH!? eh.. sure anot."
Dad *driving* WTF?!?
Me: "okay.. bye.."

Dad n I exchanged glances. having that spastic look on our faces.

Me: "HHAHAHHAHAAS... yeahh.. TIO PIAN!!! woo.... nvm we go eat PRATA!!!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Perfectly good example showing the miscommunications among humans.

Tom's supposed to inform Jerry bought the meeting tmr. But Tom thought that Peter will be the one informing instead. In the end, things either turned out to be rushed and "not up-to-standard" or misunderstandings might arise. Thinking that the other party is so irresponsible of him/her. Such problems are so commonly found in today's society, probably it could be related to one's upbringing. Some Singaporeans are just so inconsiderate, apathetic (relax-one-corner-attitude), racist .. oh man.. I think a blog entry would not be enough to describe all, a thesis will be sufficient yea.

I just hate ppl backing out on the eleventh hour, WITHOUT a valid reason or with an obvious excuse that u're just lying to me. Fortunately humans r rather forgetful, so such ill-feelings wouldn't dwell within one for long, at least for me, it ticks this way. NO overnight grudges. =]

enough for today... i'll blog more tmr.

Meeting friend lata, its her bday~

Happy Birthday Cheryl~~ Q.C.C.L rawks. ~

10:58:00 AM let 'em go.

Saturday, April 09, 2005

happy birthday to u,
happy birthday to U.
happy birthday to jie-ying's-bloggg
happy birrrthhhhddaaaaeeeee ttoooo uuuu!!

-Ben Er

9:05:00 PM let 'em go.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BLOG~~

12:05:00 PM let 'em go.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

this made me think...
woo babe, i love those legs. (craps)
My mind just went blank and i just love this feeling. coz its called, stoning. =]

Flashes of images and memories, all being pumped up into my mind relentlessly . Events lead to thoughts, thoughts turned to passive feelings, these feelings changed over time into some tangled emotions which knots up the heart. And i think its almost a deadknot. SOON to be i guess. stop. paranoia. yes. it is.

okie. update bout school.
I got into combi 606. which is... physics, chemistry, econs and cmath. yeap, four A's.

Zak: "What for? u're leaving already.."
Me: "um......" - speechless.

I have no idea why i took that. I just let my feelings guide me when making decisions like that. I just have to learn to accept what's being given to me, and make the best out of it. But it'll be tough , which i already expected and prepared for what's coming .

I've been exceptionally stubborn during the first week in SRJC, having the mindset like "I HATE THIS PLACE, LEMME GET OUT OF HERE!!! POLY POLY!!"
things have changed definitely.

tomorrow will be dreadful , new CGs, no more "bridge sessions" or daidees.
i'll miss u peeps.
Everyone will be going separate ways, different classes i mean. meeting and making new friends. less time together like before (going for MJ ? running out of sch, got caught by rolly polly, then came up with the idea that we'll be selling chicken rice for the rest of our lives.
-___-'' ) hahas.. we had our fun ~

getting pretty late already, gtg~ ciaos. =] more updates tmr.

12:31:00 AM let 'em go.

Monday, April 04, 2005

While i was walking back home alone earlier today , i almost crashed.

I'm still in shock, of course.

I don't use the pedestrian pavement, i just walk alongside of the road ( don't hafta keep dodging tree branches etc )

I was listening to mp3s on e way back.
I think i'll get myself killed one day, really soon. Guys, if that really happens, please remember to visit me often @ Lim chu kang or erm.. whatever.

MORE BANGLAS sighted. argh.

11:39:00 PM let 'em go.

Sunday, April 03, 2005

Death of Pope John Paul II , 1920-2005.

Cardinals will be electing the next pope.
Elections will being after 15-20 days after pope's death.
Kinda curious how will it be like inside the Sistine Chapel during the voting... hMmmmm.....

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

okie. enuff bout death.

Lectures will be starting next week, taking four subjects(pcme) . I'm not going to shortchange myself again like what i did during the first three mths. Taking all subjects more seriously will be a better way out, at least i've gained some knowledge?? nahs, just in case something unfortunate happens to my appeal to Ngee Ann Polytechnic.

I miss IJ's OG and CG, they're sucha great bunch of peeps .

I like IJ's environment n peeps.
I hate SRjc's building, uniform but i think the chicken rice ish nice. hahas.
I have loads of company (ex-mayflowerians) in SRjc.

ARGH. comparing doesn't help , shall end it here. Or else it'll be an endless list.
Hope that i'll interact more wif my OG, they're nice ppl actually.

gtg. ciaos.

5:53:00 PM let 'em go.

Saturday, April 02, 2005

....................................................................................................................................................

As the years pass by Before my face,

As wars rage before me,

Finding myself

In these last days of existence,

This parasite inside me,

I forced it out.

In the darkness of the storm

Lies an evil,

But it's me.

jieying. 1.18pm.

................................................................................................................................................

1:16:00 PM let 'em go.

i think i messed up quite alot wif my skin. arghh.. shall do that when i'm free nx time. too lazy to bother already.
futile attempts to scan my design and put it up on my blog as the skin.
the lazzy brain again came up with an alternative, which is to put up the old giraffe .
I went to search for e old file that i've saved it in, **HORROR*** omgwth. i think i lost it.
oh well, i'll try searching for it again. i'll just make do with what i have right now.

Singapore's weather turning rather humid and wet these days. It have been raining every afternoon since the start of the week, and that's really nice for a nap. =] I'll just have to open the balcony door and viola~! hm.. natural airconditioning.

Listen to the rhythm of the raindrops, reminise bout the past , living the moment and picturing the future.

Supposed to go out for some shopping wif nel today. Smsed her but there's no reply.. so i guess i'll just revise my jc stuff today. Go cycling wif brothers in the evening. Supper wif dad @ serangoon.

Currently Listening : JJ's new album. No. 89757.

12:32:00 PM let 'em go.