to fly.

Sunday, April 25, 2004

ok.. i've been slacking too much. its tIme tO hIt the "panic button". wAke uP jy!!. 12 days to mid year!!!! really crave for some adrenaline in life. losing tat drive to do really well.. body not responding to the commands from e brain. eRr... i've sort of.. planned out the study schedule .. aNd realised tat. I'm running out of time. OK. I shall mark this day as the beginning of my sufferings n agony. No internet access till 17th May. hahaha.. but 14th may will be an exception. gOnna cRush the monitor into bits. call for tHe kId nx dOor wHo iSh really gOod in kArate tO 'chop' my keyboard into half. fEed the mOuse to the wandering cats out there. aRgHhhh!!!

My results aren't up to my expectations yet.. amath have not been scoring well too.. juz did some revision for my emath. ok.. i'm really pissed off when i can't get the correct answer. tried like so many times - forget it. .. the chemistry test on friday was a disaster. fell asleep on thur nite.. last min revision did help a LIL'. but, i'm sure i'll be scoring borderline marks again.. hey ben ! come oUt study!! JIU MING!!

yah.. chinese.. omG.. tat's like a whole heap of shit tat i need to memorise in like. juz 2 weeks? ok. action speaks louder than words. I don't think all these verbal complains will help anyway.. and on the other hand, i've been wasting too much time online. surfing the net. doing really silly stuff. chatting. blogging in fact. ok.. gtg. be back in 2 weeks time? .. mayb praying to all gods might help a lil. *craps*

LOve u aLl!!~ ~~

3:20:00 PM let 'em go.

Saturday, April 24, 2004

*strewing flowers around blog* -_______-"' ok.. stupid thoughts...

brother beside me .. such a bother. wadever... mum can't do anything to him. it was ironical that how such things tend to happen...

Been kinda busy these days. yeah. busy sleeping. Think i'm having some... weird illness. tend to fall asleep easily. sighh.. tat's a bad omen. Exams are around the corner, and me... didn't start revising on any subjects yet..

hMm.. found a lil' stigma on my upper thighs.. wOo.. after 15 yrs of my life.. then realised its existence.. lOlx.. mUm knew it. but i din.. ?

Countdown to Mid year exams : 13 days.

7:33:00 PM let 'em go.

Thursday, April 22, 2004

hm.. went to yY hSe today - purpose - > study for the upcoming chem test. hMm,.... hahha.. sort of expected how the outcome would be.. mE n my "ai ai" *blush** yY n nEl.. seems to gormandize on all the food avaliable...fRom fried rice - potato chips - ice cream - noodles - gummy bears . hahaha..
hMm.. tIs is cute. yY's lil' bro asked me about his hw... he's only kindergarden 1 .. and i er.. hEez.. kind of.. stumbled upon the question.. hahahha.. it goes like.. rearrange the pictures in order of ' 1, 2 , 3 n 4'.. and.. the picture showed some boy playing toy cars.. then the others are like..hMm.. he with some buckets and those lil' toy cars inside it?.. hUh?! -____________-? er... think i've been doing too mUch amath n stuff. .. can't 'tune' back to a kindergarden kid's perspective.. anyways... at least.. we did some revision.. yeah. i really mean.. s . O. m. E.

gtg study chemistry .. tata~

9:10:00 PM let 'em go.

Wednesday, April 21, 2004

four periods of maths today was kinda dreadful... as usual.. mr chan and his perplexing 'declamations'.. kimL* & gang drew smth really.. aMusing.. haha.. starring... teddy bear.. special appearances fr 'angel des', 'big bro, huai', 'gloomy bear, nel' and.. of course.. me-> the sole survivor.. lOlx.. yeah~ tmL goIng oUt~~ wEe... lalala

4:34:00 PM let 'em go.

Tuesday, April 20, 2004

............*perspiring* Been sitting in front of the damn com for like.. juz 5mins onli? oh man... the weather sux. Just received the schedule for my mid-year-examinations.. 6 - 17th of may... *sigh* as usual, i think no one's gonna remember tat dae* . Most probably everyone will be busy studying or smth... hmm.. wadever.. used to it already..

8:15:00 PM let 'em go.

Monday, April 19, 2004

Bored at home. Went thru my song list... found tis lil' nice song.. from Jason Mraz.. his album was out like.. last nov ? it's nice listening to it again once in a
while...

J a S o n M r a z - - You And I Both

Was it you who spoke the words
that things would happen but not to me
Oh things are gonna happen naturally
taking your advice and I'm looking on the bright side
And balancing the whole thing
But often times those words get tangled up in lines
And the bright lights turn to night
Until the dawn it brings
A another day to sing about the magic
that was you and me

Cause you and I both loved
What you and I spoke of
And Others just read of
Others only dream of the love that I love

See I'm all about them words
Over numbers, unencumbered numbered words
Hundreds of pages, pages, pages forwards
More words then I had ever heard and I feel so live

Cause you and I both loved
What you and I spoke of
And Others just read of
And if you could see me now
Now you and I, you and I
Not so little you and I anymore
And with this silence brings a moral story
more importantly evolving is the glory of a boy

Cause you and I both loved what you and I spoke of
and others just read of and if you could see me now
well I'm almost finally out of

and it's okay if you had to go away
just remember the telephone works both ways
But if I never ever hear it ring
if nothing else I'll think the bells inside
have finally found you someone else and that's okay
cause I'll remember everything you sang

Cause you and I both loved what you and I spoke of
and others just read of and if you could see now
well I'm almost finally out of words

9:58:00 PM let 'em go.

To a friend :

We cannot tell what may happen to us in the strange medley of life.
But we can decide what happens in us - how we can take it, what we do with it- and that is what really counts in the end.
How to take the raw stuff of life and make it a thing of worth and beauty - that is the test of living.

Yar, that's another reason on top of ur that "i-am-still-a-virgin-n-so-that's- stopping-me" thing. And the other "i-will-burn-in-hell" reason.
Hmmm.. hope this helps.. I have no idea of how to erm.. 'warm' that cold & delicate spirit of yours - out of a joke .. tat's pretty hard u see.. so.. ok. wadever.. appreciate wad i've done here. Hope ur PMS will soon pass.. hahaah .. been with you for quite a long time already. Get rid of it brudder!! - u like so lowwwww today....

9:36:00 PM let 'em go.

Saturday, April 17, 2004

there's something peculiar bout' today ... after all the crazzy stuff we did last night, and seeing the same old people today again... back to their respective duties.. ahhaahah.. (weird feeling) Their "i-still-need-some-slp" look.. haha.. we all seems to fall into a maniacal frenzy last nite.. LolX~! and today... total change.. lunatic --> obedient students..
*phew* sPeEchHh day is over!!~ yEah~~

damn.. ms lo's speech is soooo damn lonnggg.... (1/2 hr)
thank god i escaped.. heehe.. slipped awy with janel through the backdoor.. sigh... the weather isn't getting any better these days.. still the same .. torrid weather.. and humid too.. where's the RAIN??!?

I slept from.. hMm.. 12-6pm i think...in da living room.. tat's the cooolest place that i could find already... had lots of dreams... *shrugs* quite scary ones.. i think i've been thinkin' too much these days..

hMm.. i've been having high spirits these days.. mayb its the pOwer of.. erm.. yar. tat. =] hahaha.. used to be the "solitary traveller" at home.. anyways.. there is.. a time to every purpose.. ~

7:32:00 PM let 'em go.

Friday, April 16, 2004

hMm.. had a reaLLy fUn day today~~ wEeeeE!~~~

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEI LING~~ haha.. er.. dun think u can see tis.. but.. wadever.. heez..

11:20:00 PM let 'em go.

Thursday, April 15, 2004

weE~~
****i'm so happy**** Though i'm really sick now.. but.. whenever i think of you.. . . =]

and yeah, Mayday rawks~! ~!

10:46:00 PM let 'em go.

bahhhhh......

my sore throat didn't get any better. And on top of tat... i'm having flu also.. hate this feeling... I can't taste or smell anything.. arrRr.... i'm hungry.. but.. no appetite for anything right now.. sighh...

stupid site... down again.. song gone... ..

Just finished tuition not long ago... I'm having a rather bad headache .. amath qns.. really damn friggin tedious..

dInner's here.. lOoks delicious. tastes like .. nothing. haha.. cya~

7:18:00 PM let 'em go.

Wednesday, April 14, 2004

rather bad day for me today... Think its becoz of the weather these days...kinda like blowing hot and cold.. and too much sweets for me... the last two periods of school was likE hell... had a spinning headache.. feeling damn nauseous .. sore throat.. arghh... after tat.. gotta rush thru lots of stuff.. lunch, changing into my guides full-u .. Rehearsing for the upcoming school event.... dumb.. really dumb stuff... okok.. not to be too offensive to fellow uniform grp members.. Its QUITE dumb.. haha.. *cough*cOugh* arghh.. i'm sick. siann half.. tat means.. i'm restricted to lots of food already... even swallowing my saliva seems torturing.. . ..

8:11:00 PM let 'em go.

Tuesday, April 13, 2004

Updated tis song... by M i c h e l l e B r a n c h - I'd Rather be In Love.

I find it really nice... gOt another song coming right up tOo.. i'll update it the day after... yUpz..

I find all these blog thingy.. writing entries everyday... telling everyone what i'm doing... kinda makes me feel.. insecure? hM... well.. benji, u lar! ok.. i'm saying really weird stuff again.. arghh.. wad's wrong with me these days... there is something peculiar about things happening around me .. have tat queer feeling every now and then.. especially when i'm alone at home.. i think i'll need a psychiatrist soon.. hMm.. probably its all becoz of stress?

listening to my all-time fave "swing swing" again.... sighh... yer.. all-time fave.. coz i'm always down... sighh... since jan.. v . siann. hallf... i.. wan.. to.. start.. mugging*.... been stoning since i came back from sch...

10:24:00 PM let 'em go.

Butterflies~ what fasinating creatures they are.. Start to fall deeply in love for these amazing creatures when i'm really young(sounds quite exaggerating? hahaa.. its tRUe k?!!? ) I think this liking for butterflies started when I'm in hMm... k2? cOz .. i spent most of my time out at the garden... rUnning about the house.. out of the front door.. dash towards the backyard, inside the house again.. up the stairs.. into my rOom, eNter the balcony, oUt the balcony, iNto aNd oUt of my bRo's rOom, into my pArents's rOom, iNto tHeir tOilet.. (half-time, rest for like.. 15 sec) oUt of tHe rOom, jUmping dOwn the stairs, and oUt of the fRont dOor again. Yes, the procedure repeats for like... erm.. an hour or two?? That pathetic maid of mine... will start to whack us? wtf rite??? Maid whack children. Child Abuse!!! dEn... yar.. the rUnning bEgins again!! oLe~ oLe~ oLe~
okay.. back to butterfies... hMm.. shit.. memory lapse.. -______________-
**recollecting memory data** haha.. yar.. remember ler.. hMm.. there used to be bees and butterflies flying around the garden.. I'm really petrified by those lil' bees... but.. sort of enjoyed watching them working on those flowers... so cute! and the butterflies.. tOo~ My bRother aNd I used tO go iNto da garden, lOok at e leaves.. searching for caterpillars.. I saw blue ones~ sO adorable! hMm.. Having such a short life span, made them vulnerable creatures.. (i'm gonna start my ecological theory) Man these days, clear forests for wadever development they call, destroying the essential habitat that organisms live in. sigh* Something tat disturbs me most is insect speciments.. not only insects, animals... etc. Such callous acts must be proscribed!! okay... gonna update later.. eat dInner fIrst~ cya~

7:07:00 PM let 'em go.

7:02:00 PM let 'em go.

wOo~~~ testing testing~~ hahaha..

6:50:00 PM let 'em go.

Sunday, April 11, 2004

You held my hand and walked me home, I know.
Why you gave me the kiss, you are something like this, you made me go, o o
You wiped my tears got rid of all my fears, why did you have to go?
Guess it wasn't enough to take up some of my love, cause its so hard to trust.

Well did I, not tell you,
That I''m not Like that girl
The one who, gives it all away

Did you think that I was gonna give up to you, this time?
Did you think that it was something I was gonna do, and cry
Dont try to tell me what to do
Dont try to tell me what to say
Your better off that way

This guilt trip that you put me on, was, messed me up and done no wrong.
Any thoughts of you and me have gone away.

Dont tell me what to say, you're better off that way
I'm better off alone anyway

A v r i l L a v i g n e - Don't tell me

11:43:00 PM let 'em go.

thurs - fri - sat - sun => tuition... -_____- nvm.. its over!! Yeah~ wEnt "sao3 mu4" tis moRning... wad's it in english? clean grave? sounds kinda inappropriate.. okiE. back tO "sao mu" haha.. i tHink it is my second visit ... if I'm not wrong..
6.30: Mum n Dad screaming. "gEr ar! wake up!! yao qu sao mu ler.. ni de ah gong ah ma.. kuai dian!"
6.45: Been tolerating for the past 15min, and I realised something. To MUM : [ you haven't change a single bit ever since you brought me into this wonderful world...(wonder if you're like tat before i'm born..well i'm not around .. i'll check wif dad) You are still so vital, full of life. and for sure, your voice = dynamic~ ] To Dad: I look up to ya!! **admiration** To Bro: She's over me already, its your turn. But you're indirectly affecting me. We live under the same roof k? You hear her voice. Me too.!?

We reached the cemetry at around 7.30? not really sure... quite surprised that one of my couz was there too. And even more surprised tat only two of us went?! KIDS THESE DAYS... ONLY GOT COMPUTER, ARCADE AND SOCCER!! And yeah, lots of traffic. Dad told me tat today's traffic wasn't that bad, compared to last year's... Had a scrumptious breakfast.. really lots of things to eat.. eg, "shio bah" roast meat~~ mY fAve~ bUt.. mOrning.. eat shio bah.. o.0 ? no appetite for those kinda stufF yet.

Haze hanging low over the place, because of the burning of offerings, and incenses. People, mostly all in their tees and shorts. All coming in large numbers. Through these kind of occasions or festivals, kinda like bonding time for us again... hahah... Cause everyone has their own work and things to do, and might not bother to catch up with one another. Therefore, we mUz thank tHe oNes wHo cReated festivals(craps) ~ hMm.. aLthough its jUz onli a cOuplE oF hRs of gEt tOgether.. bUt. yEah.. bettEr then nothing.

Getting lazy.. dun write ler.. cya =]

6:33:00 PM let 'em go.

Friday, April 09, 2004

hm.. my fIrst blog.. =] gD buddy of mIne 'forced' mE into tIs bLog stuff... left mE here aLone, aNd feeling helplEss, tO sUrvive oN my own... -____- okie.. cut the craps. hMm... i'm dOin' amath nOw.. kInda cOnfuSing... darn integration chapter.. Halfway through, I flipped to the back of e book checking for answers, alMost all of them were wRong~! okay.. i'm doing amath with a wrong state of mind. sIgh...* carelessness still lingers . wonder when i'll kIck tIs bad habit.. . Anyway, tml gOing oUt~ wEeeE~~ gOnna have lOads of fUn~...

1:12:00 AM let 'em go.